My childhood best friend had the coolest wooden cubby house in her backyard. Of all the fantastic things we imagined up in there, the one I remember clearest was playing house. It was always a variation of being pregnant or being a new mother, and something dramatic happening that ended with someone fainting.
It’s always been in me to be a mother. I dreamed that I’d grow up, marry straight away and enjoy the reality of a growing family. It was late high school when I realised that I might have to take a few detours to my dream.
I married a little later than childhood Emily would have liked, but life showed me it was for the best. A challenging three years later and I’m still taking detours. Surgery, miscarriages, investigation, and treatment later and my arms are still waiting for that first hold.
The reality of the length of my detours forced me to have a serious evaluation of my motherhood and how I can be more proactive in a sphere that I have limited control. This is why I entered number fifty five to the list… Milly Dates.
The year before I got married I received a new responsibility at church. I’d been given a leadership role over all the children, from 18 months to 12 years old. I was SHOCKED. I’d always served in the youth program and as much as I loved kids, teaching them was a totally new thing for me.
Although the responsibility was tiresome and challenging, it didn’t take me long to fall in love with those kids. When Josh and I got married, we moved out of the area and I was released from the position. Now attending a new ward, knowing the least amount of people, I missed my kids especially.
As people began to invite us into their homes, I started making friendships with their children. After church kids would flock around me and people would make comments about being the pied piper. They thought it was cute and lots of them assumed it was because I served with the kids, but I didn’t. Amused, I told Josh that it was simple. I would merely say 'hi' to the kids, ask if we could be friends, and ask them questions about themselves. It’s a basic formula that I think as adults we sometimes forget.
As these children began to sit with me during church services I started to see that my influence as a mother was not only limited to the children I was still waiting for. Every time I saw these kids I had the opportunity to love, teach and help them.
This in no way makes the waiting game any easier, but I know that it does reinforce my identity as a mother. Mothers come in all different shapes and sizes, and their frequency and ability to mother will change. Times and seasons, and all that. This is my season. And I’ve now learned how to embrace it.
A year and a half ago I fell in love. Her name is Milly. I wrote all about it right here.
Over a year later, in the coolest twist of fate and amazing timing Josh and I moved house, but minutes away from Milly. Once we’d moved I got pretty into the routine of heading to Milly’s for a little play about once a week. Seeing her at church once a week as well was beginning to also be a highlight to the week.
Within myself I was starting to feel like I wanted a more active role in my mothering, and opportunities and experiences that were a little closer to the real deal. In her great generosity, Milly’s mum and boss babe of Made to Milk agreed to letting me take Milly for a few hours once a week. So Milly dates were born.
We’ve now had countless dates and endless fun. The love affair has now continued to include my cat Jimmy Choo. Anytime you’re keen for a laugh just put the two together. Jimmy’s petrified reactions and Milly’s ecstatic screaming always makes for a good combo. Some of our other fab dates have included:
Wallsend Library Rock n Rhyme Time
I did not know this even existed. I remembered my mum taking me to library events as a kid, but I thought they were just during the holidays. I stumbled upon this fun and free event and though, goodness that is cool! For 30 minutes on Wednesdays and Thursdays you can bring your little ones for stories, singing and dancing. If you want more info check it out here.
Painting Date
A super talented arty friend of mine had posted about her kids painting totally adult help free. I’d also seen a few pinterest examples of giving kids a blank canvas, paint and letting them go to town so I thought we’d join in. After a quick trip to Officeworks to get our supplies we were ready and loaded. Thankfully Josh joined my on this because fun things turned real messy, real quick.
School Holidays Date
Over the summer holidays it’s not super hard to find fun stuff to do, and because of the amazingness of social media sharing I was able to find some free stuff too! Stockland Glendale had the coolest promotion going. Centre Management were giving a free activity pack for kids coupled with a voucher for a free hot beverage at Gloria Jeans while the kids played with their activity packs. But wait, there’s more. They also had free face painting set up. Coupled with a nice walk through of the toys at Kmart, we were done for the date.
Playdough
Kids love touching stuff. Like all the stuff. So I decided to get my resourceful on and whip up some homemade playdough. A nice walk over to Coles for our ingredients, a little play while the dough cooked and then we were set. Thanks to my Thermomix the process was quick and easy. I used this recipe here. I think one of the best parts is knowing that its super safe if the kids get hungry and go to town snacking on it.
I’m super grateful for the opportunity I’ve had to grow such a special and unique relationship with Milly, and the way that it’s helped me better understand my role and influence as a mother. The dates definitely don’t stop here, so if you have any ideas or some favourite places or activities to suggest then hit me up!
