Originally posted on 15 February 2017.
Two years and seventy eight days ago I said goodbye to the single life and hello to married life. It’s been great… and sometimes not so great. That's life right?
Single life was the social life.
Mid week hangs, Friday night beach trips and late night chats in the car. The young single adults program at church made it super easy to have something to do and someone to do it with. It was never far between a catch up with my besties and favourite people to be around. I had a pretty short 22 years of single life (which at times felt like an eternity!), but along with them is a list of things that I do not miss…
Awkward conversations with guys, feeling self conscious about my sweaty hair at church dances or trying to figure out the whole back and forth “does he like me?” thing. BUT, the number one at the top of my “I miss” list is getting to see my people so often.
It has been such a natural thing to say that when I got married priorities changed, so obviously catch ups were going to be further and further apart. It became the default answer. Somehow the older I get, the busier I find myself (yo life, what’s up with that?). What became such a blessing was that I found myself frequently repeating-
People make time for the things that matter.
So I got to thinking that the things that make me happy matter, and seeing my friends makes me happy. It was a no brainer. It was time to get a start on seeing my people again. So I got onto making number twenty three happen… catch up with Chad and Leia.
Chad and Leia were one of our young single adult couple friends. It became a bit of a trend amongst a few of us that there was always a new engagement by the time we were at the engagement or wedding from the last engagement. We never planned it, it somehow just happened that way.
Chad and Leia came to our wedding, and a short few months later, we went to theirs. It was awesome to share such a happy step together. We all lived married life. Us in Newcastle and them on the Central Coast. We got busy… and pretty much never saw each other.
It was only three months ago, that I was scratching my brain trying to remember when we last saw each other and I was totally shocked when I could only think that it had to be at Chad and Leia’s wedding! Practically 2 years ago!
Both on the Nike list hype, Leia and I were determined to #justdoit and organise a catch up. The plan was a simple, but scrumptious picnic lunch at an amazing park. In my mind I’d assumed we’d be there for a few hours eating lunch then off for a scenic walk, then back home in our separate ways. BOY was I shocked and so pleased when that walk turned into a couple of hours and followed by another sit down chat! We were ready to just keep talking and talking. Dinner time pending was the only thing that got us ready to finish up.
We bonded over mutual circumstances of having fertility and pregnancy challenges. It was so refreshing to be able to share and listen to one another’s struggles, pains and secret guilt that we felt we couldn’t really express to others. We knew that we didn’t share the exact same hurts or frustrations because we were on our own life’s journey, but it felt good to know that we weren’t alone in wanting to be ‘expecting’ and feeling we were continually coming up short.
Most of all it was an opportunity for us to realise how important our friendship is, and that something as simple as ‘being busy’ isn’t a good enough reason to miss out on seeing each other. Sure, life may seem busy. It always will.
The plan is to plan.
If we have to pencil something in two months early to get it on the calendar and in the schedule then that is what we need to do...and will do.
